Education and the Child
Most parents in well to do families, especially the mothers, get into the trap of “My child comes first in class”. It is an easy trap to get into in today’s set up. The number of children in an average family is two. Thus there is unnecessary focus on the children. Moreover there is a growing ‘Keep up with the Joneses’ Syndrome or fear of being left behind in a progressively competitive atmosphere. It is an obsession that may cause immense psychological damage to the child. Just as we know that a child’s eating habits are reflected in certain personality traits; so also a parent’s attitude towards his child’s studies may create certain changes in the child’s total personality.
And the dangerous aspect is that this nightmare for the children begins as early as the first year of his school. Coming first or second or last (for that matter) is a mode of assessment for the teacher. Why should it be of such importance to a parent? At such a young age? Education is about personality development. It is about exposure. It is about learning skills to be able to be financially and emotionally equipped to handle the world. If one comes first when one is going on about this business, it is the extra cherry on the cake. It is but an added bonus. It is no business of parents to transform this self-discovery, of being able to come first due to one’s own efforts, into an unnecessary, obsessive burden.
Payal was in the third std who always stands first in class. Once when she missed her rank by 2 marks she was inconsolable. Sudip was in the second class. After coming first in all his subjects as well as in most extra curricular activities he asked his parents, “When will I finish studies?” Is this the generation we are moulding? Being unable to cope with failure? Developing an aversion for studies at an early age? Isn’t it high time we encouraged the children to enjoy: whether they are playing or studying. And enjoyment is bound to show in results. As parents we are in a supervisory capacity only to channelize his energy and help the child to optimize time management between studies, physical activities, TV viewing, using the computer and the child’s various other activities not to twist his personality with added complexes..............
I am no head of department. I am no member of any advisory committee of education to write this piece on the traumas of our education system. I am simply one extremely worried parent who has a background in education.
Every morning I race against time to get my child ready for school. My eyes refuse to shut out the wonderful world of dreams and open up as I push and pull my son awake. I pull down his pyjamas as I brush my teeth. I agonize with him when he suddenly remembers he has a class test, which he has forgotten to study due to lack of time, as he had to tackle four other subjects yesterday. I shove his breakfast down his food pipe and pray he doesn’t reverse the process. I switch on the cartoon network to get him to open his eyes and mouth. In the early morning bathing ritual I hardly have time to get behind his ears or under his arms as the countdown has already begun. With his heavy bag on his back my son has to do the BPET (battle physical efficiency test) till the bus stop. At times he misses the bus due to nature’s call. A smouldering father then has to chip in, in this madness and drive his son to school. I look at the watch. It is only 7o’clock and I feel exhausted.
And then.
As soon as my child reaches home the struggle begins all over again.. I sit patiently to see a properly balanced meal being consumed at an improper lunch hour and pray for a proper digestion. By the time he is through, he struggles to keep his eyes open. And for once I trust my motherly instinct and pack him off for a nap. According to a deal which we have struck years ago I get to tell my son the time limit of his TV viewing and he gets to choose his programme. He chooses the 5pm to 5.30 pm slot to keep up with his peers and pokeman. As soon as the credits start appearing on the screen, I shoo him off to go cycling and spend some time out in the open.(And this I can afford to due to my violent aversion towards tuitions)
As the setting sun drapes the earth in a mist of wonder and beauty I open up my sons homework diary. To sign another evening of another battle with time. I sigh as the lines of a poem drift through my mind,
What is this life
If full of care
We have no time to stand and stare………
As we wade through geographical data, historical evidences, language skills, scientific fundamentals and numerical problems I loathe myself for the pathetic quality of time I spend with my son. I discover a higher pitch in my voice everyday. I also discover that I am a mother and am at the same time capable of abusing that right.
Being a teacher myself,I know the dangers of parental involvement in a child’s studies and yet I am helpless, as I am held accountable for my child’s performance in school by the school. My only consolation is my biggest worry: That I am not alone in my sufferings and although all of us are educated and sensitive enough to be battle worthy we are too battle weary to protest.
Why cannot school timings be made more sensible according to seasons?
Why cannot teachers alone be made responsible for the child’s academic performances?
Why cannot syllabuses be revised to lay more emphasis on creativity rather than learning by heart?
Why cannot teaching methods be more child friendly and project oriented(which definitely calls for a more slimmer but fitter and better toned syllabus)?
Why cannot the chapters of certain subjects (to be covered in a term)come in one volume? This would lessen: the load of the school bag on young shoulders and the rising incidence of spondilitis.
Why is there a decreasing importance on physical activity in schools?(by which I mean organized outdoor activities in shaded playgrounds and not asking the children to do ten rounds under the sweltering sun and getting them dehydrated. Like all other things the sun has also become meaner,)
Can we stand up and bring about this change or am I a lonely voice in the dark????
And the dangerous aspect is that this nightmare for the children begins as early as the first year of his school. Coming first or second or last (for that matter) is a mode of assessment for the teacher. Why should it be of such importance to a parent? At such a young age? Education is about personality development. It is about exposure. It is about learning skills to be able to be financially and emotionally equipped to handle the world. If one comes first when one is going on about this business, it is the extra cherry on the cake. It is but an added bonus. It is no business of parents to transform this self-discovery, of being able to come first due to one’s own efforts, into an unnecessary, obsessive burden.
Payal was in the third std who always stands first in class. Once when she missed her rank by 2 marks she was inconsolable. Sudip was in the second class. After coming first in all his subjects as well as in most extra curricular activities he asked his parents, “When will I finish studies?” Is this the generation we are moulding? Being unable to cope with failure? Developing an aversion for studies at an early age? Isn’t it high time we encouraged the children to enjoy: whether they are playing or studying. And enjoyment is bound to show in results. As parents we are in a supervisory capacity only to channelize his energy and help the child to optimize time management between studies, physical activities, TV viewing, using the computer and the child’s various other activities not to twist his personality with added complexes..............
I am no head of department. I am no member of any advisory committee of education to write this piece on the traumas of our education system. I am simply one extremely worried parent who has a background in education.
Every morning I race against time to get my child ready for school. My eyes refuse to shut out the wonderful world of dreams and open up as I push and pull my son awake. I pull down his pyjamas as I brush my teeth. I agonize with him when he suddenly remembers he has a class test, which he has forgotten to study due to lack of time, as he had to tackle four other subjects yesterday. I shove his breakfast down his food pipe and pray he doesn’t reverse the process. I switch on the cartoon network to get him to open his eyes and mouth. In the early morning bathing ritual I hardly have time to get behind his ears or under his arms as the countdown has already begun. With his heavy bag on his back my son has to do the BPET (battle physical efficiency test) till the bus stop. At times he misses the bus due to nature’s call. A smouldering father then has to chip in, in this madness and drive his son to school. I look at the watch. It is only 7o’clock and I feel exhausted.
And then.
As soon as my child reaches home the struggle begins all over again.. I sit patiently to see a properly balanced meal being consumed at an improper lunch hour and pray for a proper digestion. By the time he is through, he struggles to keep his eyes open. And for once I trust my motherly instinct and pack him off for a nap. According to a deal which we have struck years ago I get to tell my son the time limit of his TV viewing and he gets to choose his programme. He chooses the 5pm to 5.30 pm slot to keep up with his peers and pokeman. As soon as the credits start appearing on the screen, I shoo him off to go cycling and spend some time out in the open.(And this I can afford to due to my violent aversion towards tuitions)
As the setting sun drapes the earth in a mist of wonder and beauty I open up my sons homework diary. To sign another evening of another battle with time. I sigh as the lines of a poem drift through my mind,
What is this life
If full of care
We have no time to stand and stare………
As we wade through geographical data, historical evidences, language skills, scientific fundamentals and numerical problems I loathe myself for the pathetic quality of time I spend with my son. I discover a higher pitch in my voice everyday. I also discover that I am a mother and am at the same time capable of abusing that right.
Being a teacher myself,I know the dangers of parental involvement in a child’s studies and yet I am helpless, as I am held accountable for my child’s performance in school by the school. My only consolation is my biggest worry: That I am not alone in my sufferings and although all of us are educated and sensitive enough to be battle worthy we are too battle weary to protest.
Why cannot school timings be made more sensible according to seasons?
Why cannot teachers alone be made responsible for the child’s academic performances?
Why cannot syllabuses be revised to lay more emphasis on creativity rather than learning by heart?
Why cannot teaching methods be more child friendly and project oriented(which definitely calls for a more slimmer but fitter and better toned syllabus)?
Why cannot the chapters of certain subjects (to be covered in a term)come in one volume? This would lessen: the load of the school bag on young shoulders and the rising incidence of spondilitis.
Why is there a decreasing importance on physical activity in schools?(by which I mean organized outdoor activities in shaded playgrounds and not asking the children to do ten rounds under the sweltering sun and getting them dehydrated. Like all other things the sun has also become meaner,)
Can we stand up and bring about this change or am I a lonely voice in the dark????
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